The story so far....

So much has happened, and my head is spinning so fast that I have no idea where to begin. I'll try my best to sort out the tangle of thoughts snaking through my brain into some semblance of a sensible story.

A nearly three hour bus ride took our group of 143 wide-eyed participants from Bangkok to a beach resort in Chonburi Provence. A pit stop before the resort was at a seaside restaurant for a much needed meal. As all 143 "farangs" (Thai word for foreigners), onlookers would have thought we'd never seen water or sand before. A mad stampede to the beach ensued and 143 cameras clicked and flashed to the amusement of the Thai children playing in the surf.

I thought these were for decoration....like one of those shipwreck things for tourists, but it turns out they are just poorly parked, but fully functional boats.  All in very bright colors!

OEG finally gets to the Gulf of Thailand.  Stretch legs...snap photos...complain that we're starving.

Thai kids all wtf has happened to our peaceful day at the beach??!











Most of the group walked the length of a jetty into the middle of the gulf to gawk at the incredible view and simultaneously destroy the peace and quiet of the few Thais enjoying the evening down there.  One moment, they were all alone, and the next, dozens of loud Americans show up with cameras and endless chatter.

When the hunger pains became too intense, we headed back to the restaurant where we were served a fantastic Thai meal.  The seafood soup was one of the best things I've had so far here.  It was a very light (but very spicy) broth with shrimp and calimari.  So yummy!  Next to that, the seviche was also fantastic.

Looks a little horrifying, but I promise, it was delicious!

Beautiful sunset

After dinner, a Thai duo began playing popular music....beginning with the Enrique classic "Hero," much to our amusement.  What followed was a semi-boozy tone-deaf sing-along for the ages.

Eventually we stuffed ourselves back onto the buses for the short trek to our resort.  The resort was a huge, twentysomething-floor hotel with a beautiful pool area and a small beach.  The rooms were only okay, but not much was needed since we didn't spend much time in them.

We had a small fright when we got into the room for the first time.  I found what could have been tiny little bugs on my bed in the corner right next to the pillow.

They also could have been cookie crumbs from a sloppy maid.  Either way, I was not sleeping on that bed.  My roommate, Christine, took action and called the front desk....of course neither one of us thought our plan through too much and of course they did not understand her despite her repeatedly asking "Does anyone down there speak English?"  I suppose someone with a minimal grasp on the language came to the phone, so Christine attempted to explain.

"There are bugs on our bed."  .....[confusion]
"....insects?"  ....[more confusion]
"....there is an animal on the bed."
At this point, I'm practically on the floor laughing at the last resort, "there's an animal in my bed," explanation.  But it seemed someone understood.

There was a knock on the door.  We opened it up, and there stood a man handing us new towels.

Okay, so possibly something was lost in translation.

As our only move left, we stripped the bed, handed the sheets to the dude and said simply "new sheets."  Finally there was some understanding and he remade the bed with fresh sheets.  I still felt like things were crawling on me, but the bed was fine and in all actuality, they probably were not bugs to begin with.

The view from the window of our hotel room was absolutely spectacular:

The jungle-like pool area.  There was what we thought was a hot tub...which would have been spectacularly misplaced in this weather, but it was actually just bubbly water of the same temperature as the pool.

Our first day at the resort was a bit of a tease since we had to be in seminars and classes most of the day.  We could only look out the windows with longing at the people getting all tanned and wrinkly by the pool.  We saw both the beach and the pool the first night, but as it was dark, it was difficult to get a feel for what both were like.  From what we could tell at the beach, the water was at extremely low low tide and as such was nearly impossible to even see.  Also, there were strange lumps lining the beach in steps which we later figured out were bags of sand, probably to help stop erosion.

We did finally get to partake of all which the resort had to offer once classes were done and everyone cattle-herded toward the water.  There were fights over lounge chairs and races to the swim-up bar with only minimal injuries.  Well, but the bar did run out of fresh coconuts to hold the pina coladas, so we could consider that more than minimal injury :)

Our final night, we decided to take our lives into our own hands and venture into Pattaya City which we had been told was a pretty crazy place.  Crazy place didn't even begin to describe it.  We took a taxi into the city....and by taxi, I mean a guy, 250 baht, and the back of his pickup truck.  I mean the truck had seats and railings, but it never once escaped us that we were flying down the street in the back of a pickup truck with no seatbelts and people on mopeds cruising dangerously close to the bumper.  It was an adventure.

Except that it was hardly an adventure compared with what we were about to see.  Pattaya City was the perfect storm of Bourbon Street, Las Vegas, Times Square and Amsterdam.  I have never seen so many neon signs, table dancers, human/animal exploitation, and men in drag (literally referred to as "ladyboys" here) as I saw in Pattaya.  It is the prostitution capital of Thailand, and it is called Sin City for a reason.  If you don't arrive with an STD, chances are high that you could leave with one.

We had a surprisingly nice dinner considering the area, and afterwards, took to ogling our way down "Walking Street."  We came upon a man exploiting a child who could bend her feet all the way over her head backwards and put on sunglasses with her toes, two men dressed as flight attendants with full makeup, and a woman who shoved some sort of furry monkey into my arms and demanded I pay 100 baht for a photo with said monkey thing.

One would imagine that someone shoving a monkey in my face would make me recoil, but the little guy was just so adorable and SO depressing, that I had to take it into my arms and cuddle the poor, exploited thing.  I mean, for crying out loud, it was wearing clothing!  His teeny little fingers gripped around mine and his eyes were so sad that it made me want to cry and run off with him to a jungle somewhere where he could be adopted by a nice family of elephant orphans.  The pictures kind of still make me tear up a little, but still....

(Excuse the shiny, sweaty mess that I've been lately.  The weather here is hot and sticky even at night)

After the animal encounter, we were chased by a crazy woman and took refuge at a go-go bar.  No joke.  These girls seemed glad to have a bunch of people sit down who did not have penises and did not need erotically entertained so we played Connect 4 and some dice game and and intense Thai version of Jenga for a good while until we were sure that the crazy lady was gone and it was safe (well, relatively safe) for us to continue on our way.

 This dancer looked bored as all getout:

 Thai Jenga....not quite like the version we are used to.

We continued on our way after this, made it to the end of Walking Street and ran into quite a few people from our group of 143, but not long after a group of us decided we had had enough eye trauma for a lifetime and opted to head back to the hotel.  The group that stayed went to a show where they witnessed girls who could shoot ping pongs out of their hoo-has.  Needless to say, I believe they are still recovering.

The next morning was the last moments we could spend with most of our new friends, and we took a trip to the Pattaya Floating Market, a series of market stalls built in wooden huts lining the water and connected with bridges.  It was a crazy maze of food, clothes and trinkets, but was quite visually appealing.  Thai merchants pulled up to various docks and made deals for wares they were selling out of boats.  All in all, a pretty cool experience.

****

Our time in Pattaya done, our group of 143 had to say goodbye.  A week is hardly enough time to really get to know people, but when you are thrown into a foreign culture with no knowledge of the language and no real idea what the heck is going on, that group of 143 separate individuals suddenly, and practically within a day, becomes one of the strongest support systems you've ever seen.  I can honestly say that I don't think I've met a group of more open and welcoming individuals.  Most people were incredibly warm and friendly.  Of course when you are alone in another country, it would behoove you to be nothing but friendly!  The goodbyes were surprisingly sad as we realized that these people who we had barely known for a week but had come to depend on would be spending the next five months in a completely different part of the country (which, it turns out, is NOT actually the size of Rhode Island, but significantly bigger.....from the people in the north in Chiang Mai to those of us in the south, there is a separation of probably something like 20 hours.).

I boarded a bus in Bangkok after a van ride back to the city with two other girls, Carlyn and Stacy and we drove through the night for 11 hours to Krabi Town where we were met by our school coordinator and a few other teachers from the English program at our school, Ao-Luk Prachasan.  Like everyone in the Land of Smiles, these women were incredibly welcoming, and even presented us with bouquets of roses to welcome us to their school!

We had breakfast in Krabi Town before heading to Ao Luk to see the school and our accommodations.  Due to changes in management, we were not able to stay at the apartment complex where it was originally intended we live, but rather in a two-bedroom house that came totally unfurnished.  The three of us must have had terrified expressions on our faces as we walked into our new digs because we were immediately met with concerned "Are you okay?" questions from the other teachers.

Short answer:  No, we were not okay.  After working through a week of culture shock, we were now introduced to an entirely new kind of culture shock and were so overwhelmed that it took a few moments for anyone to speak.  The reality of the whole situation had begun to sink in, and we stared at each other with expressions that all three of us knew meant we were incredibly glad to have each other to share in our terror. My heart immediately went out to anyone who had to travel to a school on their own.  Without Stacy and Carlyn here to experience this with me, I'm sure I would have already broken down into tears, found an airport and flew home.

Lucky for us, our coordinator and the other teachers were wonderful and took us shopping for things to furnish our new home...but not too much stuff, since in all likelihood, we will be moving to a new location after a month.  They took us to eat again, and brought us to a hostel in Krabi Town where were are currently basking in the glory of free WiFi and attempting to decompress after our whirlwind of a day.  Tomorrow, we will make a short trip to the beach in Ao Nang and then head back to our house in Ao Luk to prepare for our first day of school.  There is a national holiday on Monday so students do not arrive until Tuesday, but we will still go on Monday to get familiar with the journey and the buildings.

I imaging that the first week will be trying and difficult, but I am grateful to have other girls with me, and we will do our best to power through the challenges that lay ahead.

xoxoxo
Sarah

Still on dry land

So the flood waters have not yet reached our hotel, but as a precaution we are being "evacuated"....to a beach resort. Yeah, I'll take evacuation any day over the strange, smelly mess that is Bangkok any day.

As someone who has always thought that jet lag was little more than a whiny theory, I am here, four days after landing on the opposite side of the world, to say emphatically that jet lag is legit. I'm still not certain that I'm over it since I was falling asleep in my noodles around 8pm today, and anyone who knows anything about me would feel comfortable with my analysis that the only possible way for me to wake up without an alarm clock at 6am three days in a row is due to severe jet lag. Turns out an eleven hour time difference is serious stuff, yo.

I landed at the Bangkok airport around 11:30 local time on October 21 and by some stroke of serendipitous luck ran into a girl at passport control who ended up in the hotel room down the hall from me. Her name is Jenna. Let's take a moment to count the unusually high number of people in my life with "Jen" as the first three letters of their name? Maybe I should call Guinness, 'cause Ima thinking we've got ourselves a record.

The hotel the group has called home for these past four days is the Louis Tavern, and is situated in a fringe-y area of Bangkok that does not appear on the ordinary tourist map. So ask me where exactly I am in Bangkok, and you'll get no real response.

I've explored the city a bit with various groups of new friends, but not too much since we've got a tightly packed schedule full of seminars and classes and the like which doesn't leave much room for sightseeing. I've heard it called "Beautiful Bangkok," but trust me when I say that a good portion of the capital is downright gross. Don't get me wrong though, I'm definitely happy to be experiencing a city that is so vastly different than any city in America save for maybe Hooverville, circa 1932. It's eye-opening and fascinating all at once.

Street vendors are a huge part of Thai culture, and you can hardly walk three feet without bumping into one after the other, each serving something completely different than the next. If you can get past the pungent sewage odor permeating every square inch of the city, and the fact that you are eating food served by a sweaty man with a cotton candy cart, the food is actually quite tasty. Some of it identifiable as noodles with chicken, or curried things on sticks, while others are totally unrecognizable and you must rely only on smell to tell you whether to give it a shot or run far away. There are stray dogs everywhere. Everywhere. And I'm finding it difficult to distinguish what is a real store and what is just a storage room for the giant vat of oil used to fry up the plantains on the corner.

Side note: a huge bag of freshly fried plantains for 20 baht (translation: approximately 64 cents) is fantastic! And my delicious dinner tonight was $3. Can't beat that!

There are three 7-Elevens on the barely half mile stretch of road in front of the hotel. Why 7-Eleven, you ask? No idea, but if you're looking for bottled water, y'ain't gonna find it there. Floods have caused a lot of panic buying, and even the Thais won't drink the water so we've got to find it elsewhere.

I've had noodles and chicken in some sort of broth from another cart on the street, and it was ten times better than anything we've gotten to eat from the hotel. My roommate and I got it as take-away to eat back in our room and in a break from the traditional American Styrofoam take-out containers, or even the cardboard Chinese boxes, this food was given to us in clear plastic bags. Yes, bags. One bag with the noodles, chicken and some sort of crunchy stick things; one bag for the scalding hot broth; two little bags gumband-ed together each with salt and chilies for seasoning. It's an assemble-yourself kind of meal. Barely a pinch of the chilies made the stuff so hot that I couldn't imagine what kind of death I would have been in for had I chosen to add the whole bag.

Traffic signs and lane markers are merely an ignored suggestion here, and it's not uncommon to see a motorbike flying down the shoulder of the road. Crossing the street is a whole new kind of danger. And its best to keep your eyes off the view out the front windshield on a taxi ride lest you get the distinct feeling you and your driver will soon be closely acquainted with the tailpipe of the van in front of you.

We took a trip to the Grand Palace and Temple of the Emerald Buddha the other day. Our tour guide had a voice so soft that even as I watched her lips move, I had no clue what she was telling us. The heat and humidity were off the charts, and it was all we could do to find the next little bit of shade before we melted into little puddles of white-people-ill-suited-for-tropical-weather.

Here's what I learned:
* "Wat" means "temple."

* The whole shebang is one big tourist trap and walking through is like being part of herd of cattle. I half expected someone to yell "mooooo!" I shoulda done it. Woulda been legendary....okay, maybe not legendary, but at least marginally amusing.

* It was quite beautiful, with lots of intricate glass- and tile-work lining the walls of each building.

* Pants = no admittance to certain areas. I couldn't actually get in to the Temple of the Emerald Buddha (which is technically jade, not emerald) since I was wearing pants. I was told it was pretty much the same thing as the other temple that I was able to get into in that there was a million people and it smelled overwhelmingly of feet (you had to take off your shoes before entering). Pictures are coming soon.

Tomorrow morning will be the end of the road for us in Bangkok (or Krungthep as it is called here....look up the full Thai word for Bangkok and tell me you don't wonder why that's necessary) as tomorrow we are packing up and heading to a beach resort on Chon Buri a day earlier than planned on account of unpredictable flooding.

Minnesota is COLD.

So here I sit in the Minneapolis airport.....I realize that may seem misleading to some since I told everyone I was flying through Detroit. Turns out I'm flying through Minneapolis. I also got the airline wrong but that's neither here nor there (although according to Jane, its because I don't pay attention to details.) Anyhow, I haven't been outside, but just the little ramp from the plane into the gate was like twelve degrees below zero. Minnesota = c-c-cold.

Was anyone aware that they don't allow people who need "extenders" on their seatbelt (aka Fatty McFattersons) to sit in the exit rows of the airplane? Something I learned today. The flight attendant had to explain this to Jabba the Hutt in the seat in front of me as discreetly as she could....'cept when you look like the thing that made Princess Leia wear the gold bikini (I'll pause a minute to give the boys time to stop salivating) its difficult for the people around you not to draw their own conclusions.....similar to when Kennywood attendants have to tel people they can't physically ride the Pitt Fall. Everyone knows.

I decided to eat at the "Wolfgang Puck Gourmet Express" which turns out is neither gourmet or express, but the worst part is the bird that seems to have made its way into the airport and is now staring at me. Not kidding. Bird. Inside. The man its about to poop on seems unconcerned, however my heart rate has increased by a power of ten and I'm pretty certain its staring me down. I was planning on waiting until I got to Thailand to buy my first set of poison darts but there appears to be a pressing need for me to find some of those now. If my aim is accurate (which it usually isn't), that little feathered minion of Satan won't know what hit it until my Iocane powder (don't ask, just watch Princess Bride) tipped dart has completed its job.

I may be getting a little to dark and twisty for this early in the trip but DEAR GOD, THE BIRD HAS LANDED ON THE CHAIR IN FRONT OF ME!!! I seriously could not be making this up if I tried.

I kicked the chair. He flew away....because he knows who's the boss of him. ME. (Cue evil, bird-vanquishing laugh).